THE BOOK OF LISTS: The 10 people with the right name for the job
campaignlive.co.uk, Tuesday, 17 December 2002 12:00AM
1. ALLAN RICH, Chairman, MediaCom
With his permanent tan, the bejewelled and always well-tailored Rich possesses all the trappings to match his name. Having ridden the crest of the late 80s media boom, Rich sold The Media Business to Grey, giving him plenty of status and the money to enjoy the finer things in life.
2. CHRIS LAMB, Consumer marketing manager, Meat & Livestock Commission
The Meat & Livestock Commission has been living through turbulent times in recent years. If it wasn't the Mad Cow disease crisis leading to a long-running French ban on English beef, it was the foot-and-mouth epidemic. How fortunate, therefore, that the commission has somebody so closely identified with his job as Chris Lamb.
3. CAMILLA HONEY, New-business consultant, Soul
Smooth and sweet talking: surely the key schmoozing prerequisites for any agency new-business go-getter. The aptly named Camilla Honey has both in abundance. Highly regarded as a generator of leads and getting herself before clients - and so nice you could eat her.
4. SUE D'ARCY, External relations executive, Masterfoods
Not so much right name for the job, more like an unfortunate one in the light of events earlier this year when the confectionery to petfood giant dumped the D'Arcy network from its global roster. Guess who had to field the ensuing press inquiries. No wonder her press releases ended by stressing she was "no relation".
5. GARY STOLKIN, Headhunter, Stolkin & Partners
Stalkin' Stolkin created a stir in September by calling for an IPA-approved code of practice for the industry's talent scouts. "The industry has been exploited by headhunters," he declared. With most agencies confident they can already distinguish the reputable headhunters from the cowboys, the plan looks unlikely to fly.
6. ED BACON, Group marketing controller, Food Brokers
An apposite name for a senior executive at the food distribution company whose brands include Lion Spots Mixture and Sula Sugar Free Drops. With a name like Bacon, let's hope he keeps bringing it home.
7. IAN BELCHER, UK Marketing controller, E&J Gallo Winery, Europe
No reflection, of course, on those modestly priced but perfectly drinkable Gallo products crowding supermarket and off-licence shelves. Just a none-too-subtle reminder of one of the unfortunate side effects of over-indulging on the grape juice.
8. Archie Pitcher, Former president, Ogilvy & Mather
Born for a career as a senior agency suit. Indeed, Pitcher was a key player in the arrival of the Ford account at O&M in the late 70s. He has just retired, aged 74, as the executive director of the International Advertising Association's UK chapter.
9. TIM PILE, Chief executive, Sainsbury's Bank
A one-time agency man - with spells at D'Arcy and Dewe Rogerson - the new man at Sainsbury's Bank is certainly at the top of the pile. Whether or not he also stands to make one remains to be seen.
10. CHRISTIAN PRATT, Railcard marketing director, Association of Train Operating Companies
OK, this one's very unfair and there's no reason to believe that he does anything other than a first-class job. Trouble is that "pratts" and "trains" seem to fit so comfortably together as to prove irresistible.
This article was first published on campaignlive.co.uk
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