CAMPAIGN DIARY: I’M ONLY A PUNTER BUT ..

What a weird old week. There I was, watching a film on telly featuring a man driving a car along a twisting mountain road. Then, during the adbreak, a car commercial also featured a man driving a car along a twisting mountain road.

What a weird old week. There I was, watching a film on telly

featuring a man driving a car along a twisting mountain road. Then,

during the adbreak, a car commercial also featured a man driving a car

along a twisting mountain road.



Nothing odd in that, I can hear you say. Well, the very next night, I

was watching a programme showing people drinking pints of beer and, just

a few minutes later, a beer commercial came on ... showing people

drinking pints of beer. I put these remarkable events down to

coincidence. Until last night.



I turned the telly on and watched a documentary in which all the people

taking part were wearing clothes. Not surprisingly, it was rather dull,

so I made a cup of tea during the first part of the show. As I wandered

back to the living room, I caught the first ad in the break and blow me,

if it wasn’t a commercial showing people wearing clothes!



Media planners are amazing, aren’t they? No wonder they even have their

own weekly slot in Campaign praising them to the skies for their

’inspired’ and ’insightful’ planning. I’d like to take this opportunity

to take my hat off to them for targeting people in such frighteningly

accurate ways.



Well, I’d like to take my hat off to them, but I can’t. Why? Because

they’re a bunch of overpaid dossers, sitting there with their flip-

charts and their Christmas TV schedules for 2004 and thinking’

Hmm ... I’ve got to find a good place to put these mortgage ads ... Oh

look! There’s a series about buying your first house on next

week ...Hmm...(hours of intense thought later) I KNOW! Let’s buy some

space during each programme because if you’re interested in house

buying, you’re probably going to be looking for a mortgage. Julian, have

you got ITV’s number?’



There’s nothing clever about placing a Safeway commercial



in the break of Ready Steady Cook. If you think that there is, then you

are quite possibly in the wrong job.



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