The past couple of weeks have been earmarked by several agencies
for their NABS Week charity efforts. There have been several attempts to
get the Campaign Diary to publish some untrue gossip (something we’d
never do) and some people even tried to involve us in the macabre
kidnapping of some small, furry teddybears.
However, one fund-raising venture that aroused our interest was the
’secret lovers’ enterprise. In time-honoured tradition, agency staff
have to woo the object of their affection by sending him or her gifts,
flowers, messages of love and other such traditional trappings of
We’d assumed that most agency people would have exhausted their banks of
creativity in their daytime exertions, so we were surprised to see a
message flash up on the huge video screen publicising National Film Day
at its launch party on Friday evening.
The screen, which up until 10pm had been screening movie trailers,
flashed up the legend: ’Lucy Telfer. This great big kiss is just for
you. Your secret lover.’
After a spot of Sherlock Holmes-style investigation, we discovered
Telfer to be an accounts secretary at Delaney Fletcher Bozell. Her
secret lover - who shall remain just that - had opted for the unusual
display of affection instead of the more traditional flowers.
However, for those of you touched by the innocent tone of the message,
let’s put the record straight. The secret lover really wanted the
on-screen greeting to read, ’Lucy Telfer. This great big erection is
just for you’, but the organisers wouldn’t allow it.