DIARY: Afternoon out at ... Maxim Women of the Year Awards - Mark Tungate loses Cat to Trevor the photographer

12.20pm Park Lane Hotel Photographers line up to snap the top totty attending the Maxim Women of the Year Awards. But when I arrive, the only celeb in view is mayoral candidate Malcolm McLaren, who is stylish but no beauty.

12.20pm Park Lane Hotel Photographers line up to snap the top totty

attending the Maxim Women of the Year Awards. But when I arrive, the

only celeb in view is mayoral candidate Malcolm McLaren, who is stylish

but no beauty.



12.30pm Descending to the bar for cocktails, I spot a blonde woman in a

backless top whom I vaguely recognise. The afternoon is full of blonde

women in backless tops whom I vaguely recognise.



12.45pm Chris Eubank enters, resplendent in tweed. By now we are

surrounded by half the cast of EastEnders, most of Brookside and almost

all of Holby City.



1pm I find my table as the ceremony begins. Joining me are Julie from

Teletext and Trevor, a freelance photographer who blagged his way

in.



1.10pm Host Jonathan Ross ushers a series of guest presenters onto the

stage. They dish out awards to various soap stars, TV personalities and

models. Eubank has the best line: ’The weaker thex are the thtronger

thex due to the weakneth of the thtronger thex for the weaker thex.’

Er ... right.



The winners I’ve actually heard of include EastEnder Tamzin Outhwaite,

Caprice and Cat Deeley, who wins Woman of the Year.



4pm Tokyo Joe’s The aftershow party cranks into gear. Cat and her mates

come down, along with Tamzin, Michelle Collins, that bloke what plays

Beppe off the Enders and lots of blonde women in backless tops. A Brand

New Heavy asks me for a light.



6pm Beppe and Michelle Collins are deep in conversation. Trevor is

chatting up Cat, while Sean McGuire - who was getting on quite well with

her - looks disgruntled. I’m engaged in drunken chat with Maxim

publisher Andy Semple, who deems the afternoon ’a triumph’.



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