PRIVATE VIEW: Steve Dunn, Ogilvy & Mather

Prat. There's a nice thing to greet you upon opening a package from

Campaign. I was beginning to think it was a note from Dominic Mills.

Instead it was one of two headlines, a term I use loosely, for Microsoft

Office. The other, and in my opinion, the more profound of the two, says

Tool. The copy in each case explains Microsoft Office is for people who

don't prat around or tool around. I can think of another four-letter

exclamation for this work.



Next Skoda. After the wonderful "something that looks that good couldn't

possibly be a Skoda" campaign, we have phase two: "For some people

buying a Skoda is still a problem." Another beautifully clear, relevant

and fertile strategy.



Both commercials are crammed with the type of stuff car manufacturers

always want to cram in. Such as What Car? Car of the year award, value

for money, smooth ride, good reviews, available in a four-wheel drive

option. Fortunately, such verbiage comes appropriately from the mouths

of Skoda car salesmen, so they get away with it. The gag is a nice one

and is the same in each commercial. The customer runs off in blind panic

at the very last minute before sealing the deal. Hats off again to

Fallon.



Now for three 20-second films for the Barbados Tourist Authority. Ads

that finally dispel the mythology that lack of money spawns the best

ideas.



Two productions feature a lot of blue screen work. Before your lips

start to moisten, not Harry-Potter-a-load-of-white-owls-and-a-great-hall

blue screen work, just literally blue screens. The third casts caution

to the wind and is completely red. Voiceovers provoke the viewer to

compare their warm bath to Barbados seawater, question the blueness of

their sky and how red their sunsets are to the alternative in Barbados.

Although creatively they mean nothing, they will cut through, so,

hey.



Now, time to pick up my bloodstained axe again. English Heritage.

There's work that wins pitches. And then there's work that finally runs.

I've a feeling the two have collided here. When Leagas Delaney had this

account, it graced it with work that was sublime. This time round it's

tired, hackneyed celebrity endorsements with headlines I hope they and

not the agency actually wrote, and passionless art direction. These ads

woefully reinforce every stereotypical elitist image most of us have of

English Heritage members. Who for one second is vaguely interested in

what Baronesses and Lords like? Obviously Messrs Greenfield and Putnam

are either on the selection committee or hobnob with them. I doubt even

the token inclusion of that popular music icon Eddy "We gonna rock down

to Electric Avenue" Grant will appeal to the other 59,147,790 of us hoi

polloi that aren't members.



More tourism work. The English Riviera. I wanted to like this. I wanted

to, but I don't. The circle isn't quite squared and that irks me. I know

they're probably trying to say, forget the wonders of the world like the

pyramids - you should see exotic Torquay. But in using advertising

Formula C, which is subvert the convention or norm by replacing the

expected with the unexpected, why use a guide? They show restaurants,

souvenirs, camels, hotels, sometimes adjacent sites. So why use a guide?

I know, I know, it looks like a good poster, it just doesn't communicate

like one.



Anti-racism in football. It could have been hard hitting. It could have

been provocative, but it's neither. It's actually a little odd and

nicely left of centre. It's shot well. It's written well. The choice of

voiceover and Land of Hope and Glory soundtrack is great. All in all,

it's excellent and my congratulations to all concerned. The gist of the

ad is that when you're born black you stay black whatever. When you're

born white, you're actually not white at all, you're pink. You go blue

when you're cold; red in the sun; yellow when you're scared (erm); green

when you're sick (double erm) and grey when you die. And white people

have the cheek to call blacks coloured.



Thank you. I claim my complementary Campaign bottle of bubbly.



1. BARBADOS TOURISM AUTHORITY

Project: Barbados Tourism Authority

Client: Jennifer Brown, regional sales manager

Brief: Encourage people to imagine Barbados in comparison to where they

are now

Agency: D'Arcy

Writers: Jon Daniel and Simon Impey

Art directors: Jon Daniel and Simon Impey

Directors: Jon Daniel and Simon Impey

Production company: MPC

Exposure: National TV

2. MICROSOFT UK

Project: Office: Mac

Client: Anton Colton, communications manager

Brief: Selling a Microsoft product to Macintosh users will never be easy

- they are loyal to Macintosh and have little respect for Microsoft. Mac

users do, however, need productivity software. The approach needed to

acknowledge the irony of this situation

Agency: The Team

Writer: Dale Nelson

Art director: Matthew Frost

Photographer: Igor Emmerich

Exposure: Trade media

3. SKODA

Project: Skoda brand

Client: Chris Hawken, head of marketing

Brief: Continue to confront the irrational prejudice against Skoda

Agency: Fallon

Writer: Andy McLeod

Art director: Richard Flintham

Director: Rocky Morton

Production company: Partizan

Exposure: National TV

4. COMMISSION FOR RACIAL EQUALITY

Project: Let's kick racism out of football

Client: Piara Powar, national campaign co-ordinator

Brief: Remind people that racism is not accepted in football

Agency: M&C Saatchi

Writer: Jerry Gallaher

Art director: Clive Yaxley

Director: Chris Palmer

Production company: Gorgeous Productions

Exposure: TV, cinema, football grounds, screens in bars

5. ENGLISH HERITAGE

Project: English Heritage

Client: Russell Hopson, marketing director

Brief: Communicate to people that England's heritage belongs to them

Agency: Clemmow Hornby Inge

Writer: Pete Gatley

Art director: Pete Gatley

Photographer: Ben Stockley

Typographer: Mark Osborne

Exposure: National press

6. ENGLISH RIVIERA TOURIST BOARD

Project: English Riviera

Client: Jan Siegieda, head of tourism and resort services

Brief: Make the English Riviera stand out from other British resorts and

be the equal of overseas destinations

Agency: cdp-travissully

Writer: Gill Sully

Art director: Ruan Milborrow

Photographer: Dod Miller

Typographer: John Gorman

Exposure: London posters



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