The last thing you want when you're showering and shaving after a workout at the gym is three black-suited giggling idiots hitting you with sporting equipment. Gillette used the sports stars in two ads this year, and they were both rubbish. However, it's the second one that deserves to be mocked the most.
2. Country Life, John Lydon
"I am an antichrist. I am an anarchist." Er, not anymore. Now he's wandering around the countryside dressed in tweed, worrying cows, sneering at farmers and banging on about crumpets. Yes, he's always admitted to being a sell-out, and, yes, the 70s were a long time ago - but is nothing sacred? Really? It's just so sad to see someone who was a trailblazer in an anti-establishment movement on his knees for the corporate (yellow fats) dollar.
3. Kellogg's cereals, Dame Kelly Holmes
God bless Dame Kelly. Seriously, for her athletic ability, she deserves our utmost respect. For her acting ability, she deserves to be put in stocks and have rancid fruit thrown at her. Not even Keanu Reeves can kill a role stone dead as well as she does. Toe-curling.
4. Knorr Stock Pot, Marco Pierre White
Apparently, Marco Pierre White's kids have the most discerning taste of anyone he cooks for. Things have obviously changed quite a lot since White's childhood in Leeds when you ate your fish finger sandwiches with a smile on your face and were thankful you got anything at all.
5. Premier Travel Inn, Lenny Henry
Lenny Henry says: "Premier Inn. Everything's premier, but the price." Campaign disagrees. Things that aren't premier: the script, the acting, the choice of celebrity, the really, really unfortunate bath scene, the kids in the lobby and the idea. Even the rubber duck is annoying. And it's inanimate.
6. Sharpie pens, David Beckham
Oh how the mighty have fallen. Just a couple of years ago, David Beckham was one of the hottest advertising commodities in the world. His face and tattoos adorned television screens, poster sites and magazine pages all over the world, for a number of high-quality brands. Now he's hawking pens, badly, and fighting a little Asian girl. Does he really need the money?
7. Inland Revenue, Moira Stewart
Internal: Office. Creative meeting going on. Creative one: "Right. The brief says it's about two different dates and we need a celebrity." Creative two: "OK. Moira Stewart, because she's serious and sensible, and two people in kitchen with one asking the other out ... on a date. Brilliant, eh?" No. Rubbish. Go back to college.
8. BBC Radio 1, various DJs
This ad really does do something special. It manages to make a bunch of pretentious Radio 1 DJs (Tim Westwood, Dave Pearce, Zane Lowe, Trevor Nelson etc) look even more pretentious. Now that is talent. And it goes on for what feels like hours. This cinema ad must have ruined hundreds of films for thousands of viewers. This ad, by Agency Republic, is proof that digital agencies should leave TV alone.
9. Nintendo Wii, the Redknapps
Talk about beauty and the beast - Louise and Harry. This ad showcases the worst Sunday afternoon in the history of the world. But the biggest disappointment is that Jamie isn't wearing a tie with a massive footballer's knot in it.
10. Microsoft, various
Just when you think that this ad, which uses the idea of mixing celebs and real people together to show just how universal Microsoft is, is too saccharine to stomach - up pops Bill Gates himself. The only light relief is that the French people sound like they're saying "I'm pissy", instead of "I'm a PC".
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