Who’d be Eric Cantona? OK, once you’ve all put your hands down,
consider it for a bit.
All you’ve ever wanted to do is enjoy a spot of painting in the South of
France. But, instead, you sign for a dull British football team and move
to rainy Manchester.
You land a major sponsor and things are going well until you’re caught
on camera attacking a fan.
After a ban you come back to great acclaim. A year or so later, when you
hand your notice in, lo, everybody goes into mourning.
People then start speculating about your chosen career when someone
sends us a picture of you seemingly helping to direct a Nike ad (so we
can start a rumour you’re going into commercials directing). Finally,
your sponsor decides that you’re no good as a mere citizen and cuts your
We ask again. Who’d be Eric Cantona?