Every Thursday, Campaign is full of ads from various magazines,
newspapers and publishing houses, each competing for advertisers’
business by claiming to have higher and wider readership than the other
or banging on about circulation figures.
Now, I’m no hotshot media buyer whizzkid or anything, but surely the
most cost-effective place to stick your ad is in Razzle. I mean, in what
other magazine could you buy a half-page inside cover in 1978 and still
be taking hits off it two decades later? See, the great thing about
pornographic magazines is that they never get thrown away, they just get
passed on.
Think about it - one copy of Razzle can change hands literally hundreds
of times in its lifetime.
It could start off hidden away in the bottom of a businessman’s
briefcase and end up being exchanged for a Dairylea Triangle in a school
playground.
The sheer brilliance of the idea only hit home the other night when I
was thumbing through a copy I just happened to have lying around the
flat.
I innocently dialled a number on the bottom of a rather compelling
direct response ad, only to be told by a bemused BT operator that they
stopped making the Triumph Dolomite some 25 years ago. So, sod the
so-called men’s style press, pump your entire budget into Big ’n’
Bouncy.
And, unless you’re unfortunate enough to end up with an insertion that
falls slap bang in the middle of the ’One For The Ladies’ section,
you’ll be guaranteed a steady flow of 11- to 65-year-old males for years
to come.
Send your rants to Diary Editor, Campaign, 174 Hammersmith Road, London
W6 7JP.
