Blood, as Woody Allen once observed, should be on the inside. But like Christopher Lee the National Blood Service wants to take it out of you. So with crucifix and garlic in hand I approached the two mailings.

Blood, as Woody Allen once observed, should be on the inside. But

like Christopher Lee the National Blood Service wants to take it out of

you. So with crucifix and garlic in hand I approached the two


There is no branding, no message on the outer. The idea is to ’trick’

the recipient into thinking the blank envelope contains something

exciting like a letter from your Gran who, funnily enough, now sends her

letters through Mailsort 2. Fair enough, I suppose - put ’we want your

blood’ on the outer and response might congeal. If you’re going to get a

paper cut, this is the mailing to do it on. The brochure tells me that

giving blood is a bigger kick than swimming with dolphins, seeing the

sun rise over the Himalayas or, er, passing your driving test.

No letters in either pack, which is probably a mistake. It’s the sort of

message that would benefit from a more personal appeal. Free tea and

biscuits is the offer.

From blood to Virgins. Richard Branson’s airline invites me to take

another trip with whomever I fancy (ooh, matron) with two free economy

tickets when I fly Upper Class. Sadly, I don’t think Sky Sports News’

Kelly Dalglish would come but they kindly offer me a ’surprisingly

beautiful policewoman’, a ’florist with nice tulips’ (geddit?) or a

’French waitress’ (minus hairy armpits). Women are offered a ’jogger

with nice buns’ (fnarr! fnarr!) or a ’man who spilt drink in the coffee


They’re trying too hard to make a joke but this laddish concept isn’t

pushed far enough to be funny or risque. Do it like Loaded or Viz or

don’t do it. Great offer, though.

Strange people drink malt whisky and even stranger people work in


This Glenmorangie mailing contains the first edition of ’the newsletter

of the sixteen men of tarn’. Yes it does. The letter from the new

distillery manager informs us: ’I persuaded (the former manager) to move

upstairs so I slipped in and nabbed his seat before he had the chance to

change his mind.’ Clearly distilleries have learned something from


It is also obligatory for anyone describing whisky to write things like

’the very process of distilling dates back hundreds of years. It is a

process that can not be hurried. It takes as long as it takes.’

But for all that, this pack has a rare charm, wit and character. And

I’ll drink to that.

British Airways recently produced a TV ad focusing on its staff’s


Nice idea. So nice that the RAC has done the same thing. A young chap

shows us cute pictures of his dad helping people and their cars. His

dad, as you might have guessed, is an RAC man. The fact that to Ben, his

dad is a hero, is no motivation to me to join the RAC. It strikes me

that this is a brand ad (give the RAC a human face) forced into a direct

response brief (only pounds 39 to join now!). In the end, as so often,

it falls between the two. Sorry Ben, but at least you can draw better

than anyone here.

Ben’s dad would drive a Ford Transit. And the final piece advertises

this famous hedgehog killer. The thick, heavy card gives it a nice

sturdy feel like the van itself. The only thing that occurs to me is

that someone needing a builder’s tip would probably not buy an


It’s a good piece using the medium well that I imagine the quiet, shy

considerate breed who form Britain’s van driving population would


Before they cut you up at the roundabout and suggest you regularly enjoy

sex with your right hand.

Chris Barraclough is the chairman of Barraclough Hall Woolston Gray


National Blood Service

Brief: Recruit new blood donors, based on detailed analysis of existing


Agency: Brann

Copywriter: Bob Pateman

Art director: Lorna Mills


Brief: Test television as a cost-effective membership recruitment

channel for the RAC

Agency: Lowe Direct

Copywriter: John Taylor

Art director: Darran Fry

Virgin Atlantic

Brief: Support the Virgin Atlantic promotion to fly upper class and earn

two free economy tickets

Agency: Rainey Kelly Campbell Roalfe/Y&R

Copywriter: Mike Boles

Art director: Jerry Hollens

Ford Transit

Brief: Reinforce Ford Transit’s heritage and launch the Crusader Transit

Agency: Wunderman Cato Johnson

Copywriter: Nigel


Art director: Paul Walton


Brief: Raise awareness and bring knowledge of the Glenmorangie

distillery and brand to the consumer

Agency: TSM

Copywriter: Rohan Candappa

Art director: Paul Ridyard

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