Those who know me might argue that there are many reasons why I
should be seeking help. However, my choice of coffee or my brand of
deodorant would probably not be at the top of the list. But I was
curious to find out why so many products now come with a helpline. Is it
simply lip-service to the trend for better customer communications or
are consumers really calling out for assistance?
McVitie’s Biscuits
The phone was answered even before I heard it ring. Do McVitie’s
Wholewheat Biscuits contain any genetically modified ingredients, I
asked? Anita, the operator, didn’t hesitate - rest assured biscuit
addicts everywhere, McVitie’s follows a non-GM policy. Anita had clearly
been briefed on this hot potato, though she was a bit miffed when I
asked her what else she could do for me. ’We’re basically here to help,
we’re not just a complaints line.’
Pret A Manger
Next, Campaign’s favourite sandwich shop (well, there’s not much choice
in Hammersmith). The phone line (not freephone, this one) was answered
by a voice which didn’t identify that this was the helpline or to whom I
was speaking. Not a great start, but it got much better.
My question was about the calorie content of sandwiches. There’s nothing
in-store to tell me which fillings are the most sympathetic to my thighs
but my careline operator, Rose, listed those which filled my low-cal
brief (no-mayo chicken is the best bet) and told me that more
calorie-conscious lines were being developed and in-store nutritional
information was imminent.
Nescafe Gold Blend
The Gold Blend ads have a heavy sexual overtone. Am I guaranteed to get
a man if I give him a cup, I asked my friendly line operator,
Louise?
I don’t think many people ask this question - she was a bit shocked, but
admitted that the answer was, unfortunately, no. Louise said that many
people ring the helpline for advice on special offers, but didn’t know
how many labels I’d need to collect to be ready for the next one, ’Some
people have thousands, though.’
Sure Deodorant
Help - how do I stop my deodorant from staining my clothes? My operator
advised I try their new bigger ball, just stroke on and leave to dry for
a few minutes. She took me through ways to wash out deodorant marks and,
despite working for a Unilever helpline, recommended Procter & Gamble’s
Ariel to lift out those stubborn stains. Nice to know that corporate
politics don’t get in the way of genuine help.