Name: Jeremy Garner
Job: Executive creative director, LBi
Professional mission: Help make these the benchmark years
Personal mantra: Reduce salt intake
6.23am Violently assaulted by a blunt market vegetable. Actually, it's just the alarm going off, but it's every bit as jarring.
6.43am Wander downstairs dribbling saliva and muttering things like "pitch", "web 2.7" and "Valium". Step into the utility room and on to something the cat has evacuated from its body during the night.
7.40am E-mails on my "yuppie scum" phone on the train. News on pitches, client feedback, staff appraisals. E-mails from myself to myself. Edit my third Seth Garner book. Names are changed to make the innocent guilty.
8.50am Chemistry meeting with a prospect. A physics meeting would be more appropriate. They need to mobilise their brand online.
11.02am An exhibition needs stills of our PlayStation3 work. The supplied template is offensive. What luck! If it were slick and neat it'd be far too pedestrian.
12.00pm Review sketched concepts and throw a pot-plant out of the window. Oops. Now I've gone and done it. That's how rumours start.
12.59pm Nose through recent awards shows. The Scandinavian stuff stands out for craft. As do ads from Japan for unrestrained thinking, and US ads for humour.
1.29pm Grab something fresh, yummy and cheap from Exmouth Market.
2.00pm Copywriting for a healthcare client. I need insights. Track down the planner to pick their brain.
2.04pm Find planner at the coffee contraption.
2.35pm Write copy and fiddle with it.
3.42pm Impromptu resource meet in the stairwell. I want a designer from the other office to swap to our gaff. A bribe is offered. Fifty pence piece in an unmarked envelope.
5.35pm Staff appraisal time. Elect to write reports later.
7.35pm Home sweet home in Cambridgeshire. My daughter, Magnolia, and I send an e-mail to Midori and Zentaro, currently in Japan. We detail Magnolia's forthcoming birthday party.
11.00pm Watch Sky News and catch the Weetabix idents. They're great. Note to self: buy some.
11.50pm Finish a couple of appraisal reports and begin this article.
12.45am Switch lights off. Hear the cat creeping up the stairs and loitering outside the door.
12.50am Dream about vegetables.