DIARY: BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION WITH ... THE DAILY EXPRESS - Celebs and politicians fail to impress Colin Grimshaw

7.30pm Vinopolis The Daily Express is celebrating its 100th birthday and its ’new’ moniker with a party in darkest south London. A gaggle of media hacks stumble around the Dickensian alleyways, hopelessly lost.

7.30pm Vinopolis The Daily Express is celebrating its 100th

birthday and its ’new’ moniker with a party in darkest south London. A

gaggle of media hacks stumble around the Dickensian alleyways,

hopelessly lost.



8pm The celebrity quotient is provided by Esther Rantzen and ’queen of

tarts’ Jane Asher, who cling together like nervous pubescents at their

first prom.



TV chef Antony Worrall-Thompson runs his expert eye over the canapes but

settles for a portion of fish and chips. King of spin Max Clifford is

promoting his clients’ latest shenanigans to OK! editor Martin

Townsend.



8.30pm The Daily Express classified crew are found guzzling shampoo and

high-rolling it on the roulette tables. Alas, it’s not on account of

Margaret Nugent’s largesse - they’re playing with ’pretend’ money. The

display team scatters at the sight of our camera. Judith Evans, a slave

to the lens, rounds them all up. Guy Chiswick, the self-acclaimed ’best

dressed man at the Express’, models his sartorial splendour. But Rob

Bratby, clearly a man with something to hide, continues to shy away.



9pm Two right-wing fanatics, John Redwood and Jack Straw, hover around

hoping to upbraid editor Rosie Boycott on the paper’s lurch towards

liberalism.



But where is she?



Meanwhile, a pair of managing directors, the Express’s Andy Jonesco and

Initiative’s Roy Jeans, battle it out like Schumaker and Coulthard on

the giant Scalextric track.



10pm Disco queen Fiona Corallini energetically leads the bopping and

Boycott finally arrives, only to be ignored by everybody on her

entrance.



Surely not a wallflower at her own party?



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