Diary: Cannes confuses us all with its Integrated Lions

Diary feels the need for an urgent call to the people at the Plain English Campaign, that plucky organisation dedicated to the elimination of gobbledygook and jargon.

The Cannes Festival organisers' latest money-making wheeze is the introduction of Integrated Lions - not to be confused with the Titanium Lions. But confused is what we all are after this head-spinning announcement of how it will all work.

"One jury will view and vote on all entries. After reaching a shortlist, the jury will award Integrated Campaign Lions and one Integrated Grand Prix and possibly Titanium Lions and a Titanium Grand Prix to any entry worthy of this most coveted of Lions. Entrants will not have to specify whether they are submitting to Titanium or Integrated.

"All integrated campaign entries will be considered by the jury for Integrated Lions and the Integrated Grand Prix. Additionally, all entries submitted to this section will be considered for Titanium Lions and Titanium Grand Prix, although it is understood that the jury may only award Titanium occasionally."

We could go on but we're afraid you'll lose the will to live.

Instead we have a suggestion. How about a Gold Lion for anybody who can decipher the above?