DIARY: DLKW forces creatives to live their very own version of Big Brother

As the nation settles down to the normality of life after Big Brother and braces itself for the onslaught of sponsorship overkill and Jade-embossed tea mugs, Delaney Lund Knox Warren's creative department has opted to keep the flame alive with its own little experiment.

In an interesting twist on motivational techniques, the creative directors, Gary Betts and Malcolm Green, who clearly have too much time on their hands, sent round an e-mail informing all creatives they were becoming part of another Orwellian experiment - Big Brother Four.

"It needed a bit of creative tension, Green mischievously says of the 18-strong creative department. He clearly succeeded in his task, as he adds: "Most of them aren't talking to each other now."

With the mistrust and backstabbing threatening to balloon to even more gargantuan proportions than is normally evident in a creative department, nominations are being collated by the creative secretary, Heidi "McCall Munster.

It is then down to the agency's staff to vote which of the two nominees gets the boot. The first luckless Johnny to go out was none other than Tom "the model Drew. Exhibiting the moody good looks of the real Big Brother's very own Alex, Drew, erm, drew the short straw and found himself making the inaugural exit.

"Gary and Malcolm are jealous of his ability with the ladies, a source whispers, exposing the wonderfully democratic process at work.

To avoid lawsuits on grounds of unfair dismissal, evictees are graciously allowed to keep their jobs, but poor Drew was forced to suffer the indignities of being Richard Warren and Tom Knox's butler for the day. "They got a bit public school about it, Green says, with almost a hint of remorse.

"He probably would have preferred redundancy."

The next unfortunate "evictee will have to be Mark Lund's caddy for the day. This is unlikely go on for too much longer though. "Or then Gary and I might have to do some work, Green shudders.

Perish the thought.


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