Diary: Fallon's search for a star is carried out just for laughs

Funny things, new relationships. Sometimes, essential information can get lost in translation as two new partners attempt to get to know each other.

Take Fallon and Asda, for instance. This week, Rick Bendel, the retailer's big, new marketing chief, went public on his belief that celebrity endorsement is overrated by retailers (clearly something he's learned since he jumped ship from the agency that put Sharon Osbourne and Coleen McLoughlin in Asda's ads).

Meanwhile, it has come to Diary's attention that poor old Fallon has been going flat out trying to get a new celebrity to star in Asda's advertising. Oops.

Diary likes to keep its readers updated, so here's how Fallon's attempts are proceeding. It seems the agency has asked Freud to help it come up with a list of potential faces of Asda.

Comedy seems to be the theme as it's looking good on the Victoria Wood front. Dawn French and Ricky Tomlinson are interested, too. The lovable Peter Kay, however, is only interested if he can do it as his wheelchair-bound alter ego Brian Potter.

Stephen Merchant is up for it, but only for a steep price (rumour has it he was approached to front the Virgin Media campaign, so he knows he's in demand). Dara O'Briain, too, is far from a snip at £500,000.

Sadly, the Great British Public will not be treated to Tom Jones touting Asda's wares as he's given a flat "no" to the very notion.

Rick Bendel, in case you need it, Fallon's number is (020) 7494 9120.