DIARY: NABS gives agencies' secret lovers a week of creative kinkiness

Is romance dead? The kind of kinkiness that would have Mary

Whitehouse turning purple ruled in this year's NABS' Secret Lovers Week,

which doubtless saw Anne Summers double its yearly sales as agencies all

over town geared up to woo the subjects of their secret fantasies.

Romancing Romeos chose vibrators and pigs in frocks, while Harrison

Troughton Wunderman's head of creative services, Vidhu Kapur, found a

new companion in the buxom form of Sade, the inflatable doll. A naughty

Steve Harrison tied the spread-eagled lady to Kapur's office wall, along

with the alluring message: "Don't keep me hanging around, big boy."

Dan Gieves, also at HTW, connected with his stalker side and sent

feverish memos around the agency warning everyone to stay away from the

object of his affections. Perhaps installing CCTV to keep an eye on his

terrified victim was taking it a tad too far, though.

"Marry me or the bunny gets it!" threatened a cut-out card alongside a

poor Peter Rabbit peering innocently over a saucepan rim in one


And aspiring models at WCRS, clearly not shrinking violets (still, look

at their chairman), got saucy by stripping down to their undies to pose

for an agency calendar. However, the dirty mac brigade with overactive

testosterone glands was kept at bay by a fine imposed on loiterers.

The award for the most romantic - or most under the thumb - man has to

go to Mike Ward at Sky, who was prepared to pay vast amounts to bribe

the right people so that he could pick his girlfriend to woo. Aah.

And although the bods at Sky went fruity by wooing with cream-covered

melons and wind-up penises, perhaps the used condoms might have taken it

just too far.