According to his first report into compliance of Ofcom's terms of the ITV merger, Connolly has uncovered some earth-shattering claims. There's no easy way to say this, so brace yourselves - his report has found anecdotal evidence that ITV plc has been engaged in the distinctly unsavoury practice of conditional selling.
Connolly has discovered allegations that those cheeky monkeys over at 200 Grays Inn Road have, heaven forbid, been strong-arming agencies to link the purchase of airtime on ITV1 with the purchase of airtime on other ITV channels.
With our whole world turned upside down, it's difficult to know what to believe any more. Next we'll be told to believe more shock revelations such as BLM Media is up for sale or that Mark Craze and Jerry Buhlmann didn't get on.