What happens to men behind closed doors without women around? They
turn into cross-dressing lookalikes, that's what.
It was just another day at the office for Solus Club members shrouded in
the usual secrecy at this year's AGM. Until, that is, the club
president, David Kershaw, departed from the floor and - under the thin
guise of a tribute to the Club's outgoing treasurer, Peter Hyde - the
first chords of a dubious musical extravaganza, Fiddler On The Hoof,
rained down on the unsuspecting audience.
Eyebrows shot up as four Abba lookalikes materialised. A red-wigged Mike
Moran of Toyota, doubtless warming up for his role as the vice-president
next year, took to the stage alongside the buxom blonde from the 70s
supergroup in the unlikely shape of Gordon Rankin from Barclays
International Banking. But although fetching in their white boiler
suits, wigs and feather boas, no amount of fruit stuffed down their
front could emulate the real McCoy.
The two songbirds were flanked by a short-wigged Kershaw and Burkitt
DDB's chairman, Hugh Burkitt, nattily attired in a fetching disposable
boiler suit. The normally sartorially elegant bunch had purchased their
white 70s look at the local builder's merchant. Nice.
Bjorn Again's ugly sisters took to the stage to wail through classics
such as "Money, money, money ... it's a Hyde-style world", and tickling
the ivories was John Billet, with Graham Lancaster entertaining the
crowd with a spirited version of Oliver's Got to Pick a Pocket or
Proceedings finally concluded with "Who wants to be a millionaire? Hyde
does." Tsk - old men behaving badly. Don't they ever grow up?