DIARY: 'Revolutionary' media idea leaves guerrillas looking like monkeys

Oh dear. Well, what on earth do you think is going on here? Could this be the middle-aged wing of Al Qaeda posing for a photograph before committing unspeakable atrocities to a seemingly mild-mannered middle-management hostage?

Or perhaps it's a well-meaning but misguided charity stunt ahead of the BBC's much-trumpeted Red Nose Day?

Well, no, it's actually rather more tragic than that. This picture illustrates the lengths that some people will go to in these straitened times in an attempt to garner a little more publicity for their business.

The terrorist, complete with AK-47, is Andrew Mate, the managing director of the Newcastle-based online media booking system Admast Media, and his bemused-looking sidekick is Tony Humphreys, the Anglia Co-operative Society's marketing controller.

Apparently, the Anglia Co-op has signed up to use Admast's broadband system and this, in turn, has caused a media buying revolution (geddit?) in the north- east, hence the embarrassing ... er, we mean amusing, costume.

The only problem with the big show they are making of the system is that media buying online has already been going on for quite some time - but, clearly, someone has failed to tell these boys that.

As The Iron Lady herself used to claim, the only way to stop these terrorists is to deny them the oxygen of publicity, so let's hear no more about this.