DIARY: Some sexual exploits, crotchless Armani and a basket over the head

Gasps of dismay greeted the arrival in book shops last week of Basket Case - 500 pages of appalling drivel about London’s media scene described by its author as ‘a book about people shagging each other’.

Gasps of dismay greeted the arrival in book shops last week of Basket

Case - 500 pages of appalling drivel about London’s media scene

described by its author as ‘a book about people shagging each other’.



The book - loosely based on Douglas Chirnside’s experiences at Allen

Brady Marsh, Foote Cone Belding, Colman RSCG, Still Price Lintas and

BMP4 - begins in 1979 on the eve of Margaret Thatcher’s first election

victory.



Karen Myhill, the Most Difficult Woman in Television, is surprised in

flagrante by her male secretary. Taking advantage of the fact that he is

ogling her partner’s genitalia, she throws a wastepaper basket over her

lover’s head, thus concealing his identity and earning him a catchy

nickname. It’s probably mere coincidence that just such an incident

happened at LWT back in 1981.



Similar coincidences occur throughout the book, which was celebrated by

a flyposting blitz at top ten agencies last week. There’s the bit where

two girls stay in the agency late at night, write pornographic

statements about their bosses on giant boards, photograph the boards and

then leave the pics ever so carelessly around the place.



Then there’s the bit where a female account manager takes revenge on a

multiple-timing creative who keeps his Armani suits locked in a cupboard

at the agency ready to jump into after cycling to work.



Blasted on stolen agency wine, the account manager pinches the keys to

his cupboard and proceeds to cut tiny pieces out of his over- priced

whistles - a delicate snip at the crotch here, a tip off a costly lapel

there, etc. Again, mere coincidence that just such a thing once happened

at BMP.



Chirnside promises he has not written the book to settle old scores. No

way. It must also be a coincidence that his last job was to run the

Channel 4 account at BMP4 and that Basket Case deals mercilesly with two

old-school joint agency managing directors - Nigel Gainsborough and

Serena Sark, nicknamed Godzilla and Dracula - who spend their time

fending off youthful talent and harking back to the 70s.



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