No prizes, but quite stimulating and more instantly gratifying than withdrawing with a box of tissues and a Baywatch video.
Courtesy of DDB London, we bring you a bit of titillation ... sorry, eroticism, on behalf of Harvey Nichols, the luxury department store that has never been afraid of talking dirty when it comes to luring more well-heeled punters across the threshold.
The question is: how many bikini-clad women can you spot riding giant lipsticks in phallic fashion?
No doubt the moral guardians at London Underground went blind trying, before intervening to keep the Piccadilly Line lust free.
Not surprisingly, the campaign's banishment from the tube network hasn't gone down very well at DDB, which is keen to rebuff any suggestion that it's peddling smut. Beautiful and a bit sexy, maybe, but porn? The very idea!
Alas, though, the defendant has previous form, m'lud. Remember the kerfuffle that greeted the ads launching the opening of the new Harvey Nicks in Leeds? Or the knitted dolls, Harvey and Hibby, famous for their witty comments such as "Nice Helmut".
Then there was the time the store got its bottom spanked by the Advertising Standards Authority - a thoroughly enjoyable experience, no doubt - for running an ad featuring a woman driver about to run down a pedestrian while she applies her lipstick in her rear-view mirror.
Finished counting yet? Neither have we. Can't seem to get our eyes off the gaggle of lovelies astride a toy train.