DIARY: TOP GEAR - The Tube

Having a pop at London Underground is like saying Alan Shearer is too slow- it’s true, but you’re picking on far too easy a target and there aren’t any decent alternatives.

Having a pop at London Underground is like saying Alan Shearer is

too slow- it’s true, but you’re picking on far too easy a target and

there aren’t any decent alternatives.



Everyone’s had a tube nightmare. Stranded at Southfields, puked on in

Perivale, trapped in a tunnel near Tooting. But forget these and look at

the benefits.



Getting to Soho from Media Business’s cosy location in the madlands of

Hammersmith (the area has the world’s highest concentration of

psychiatric clinics), often takes more than 45 minutes in a taxi. But

hop on the Tube and you’ll be there in 20 for a quarter of the

price.



The bus is even cheaper but only becomes an option if you enjoy

travelling at snail’s pace while forcing your legs into a space designed

for Dennis Wise.



No, the Underground is far superior. Just think of the amusement it

provides.



My favourite is the tourist couple who have just realised they are going

the wrong way round the Circle Line. Although the suit who gets his head

trapped in the doors runs them a close second.



True, the Tube’s a creaking heap of shit - but it still does a solid

job. Not unlike Shearer.





The Tube: pounds 1.80 for a single



Available in various subterranean locations around London.



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