Diary: twitterati - A week in the life of ... Tess Alps

Following: 265

Followers: 736

Two new addictions: Pineapple Dance Studios and Masterchef Australia.

2.48pm, 28 February

Just bought a Toyota Prius. Contrary, that's me.

12.05pm, 28 February

Push the Button: Family Fortunes meets Generation Game. Jury out.

11.30am, 27 February

Feeling left out of the spam DMs. What did I do right/wrong? "I'm 56, and make great roast spuds". That'll get people going.

8.09am, 26 February

Will pass on message RT @patroclus Telly ad: "Hello. We are Santander. Our strength and stability is built on ..." it's ARE built, you berks!

5.37pm, 25 February.