Half-Term Reports 2013: Hello People

Campaign asked the ad and media industry to rate and summarise their performance so far in 2013, ahead of our School Reports for 2014. Here's how Hello People view the first six months of their year.

Half-Term Reports 2013: Hello People

Score (self-awarded): 5

Number of staff: 10

New business / billings: N/A

Summary of the year so far: "We started the year as DHM, but pretty quickly realised that more letters were going to be needed in our name if we were to be taken seriously. More letters mean more partners, Hugh Baillie and Rachel Hatton hop aboard. Allowing us to add some e’s, o’s and l’s, then by simply swapping the D and the M for a pair of p’s, we could make the name ‘Hello People’. We start pitching. One client put off by Hugh covering him with the contents of a cafetiere. Another can’t comeback from the sight of a tramp masturbating outside our boardroom window, (the joys of Soho Square), and a third, a huge online store, goes all wobbly once they realise we would expect money to promote their business. Got to go, chemistry meeting… "

Awards won so far in 2013: "We entered our first work into Cannes. It did very well. Obviously the ads were scam, so we cunningly covered our tracks by entering it under a fictitious agency name. It’s worked brilliantly as a cover, but has caused problems publicising the actual gongs. Bloody annoying! Starting to question whether the whole exercise was a good use of £51k."