PRIVATE VIEW: Steve Henry, the creative director of HHCL/Red Cell

Private View is a fake environment, really. You only see the ads agencies want you to see. Where are the Michael Winner ads, for instance?

Is someone hiding them? Or what about Carol Vordermann cheerfully inveigling me into daytime debt? ("I'll take a vowel, a consonant and a ball-breaking repayment rate, please Carol"). Or Martin Kemp enjoying his last supper for Abbey National? Where are Yes, DFS,, Admiral and the shampoos that combat the seven signs of balding?

And talking of fake, I have a horrible suspicion that the ad for Simple Sun is what is known as a scam. But frankly, who cares? It's bloody funny.

The proposition is something about preventing irritation caused by the sun, but this is definitely the first time I've ever seen morphing nadgers on a TV ad. The main character's meat and two veg twitch, jiggle and jump around, under a skimpy pair of swimming trunks, in a quite alarming way. At one point, they resemble a former editor of Campaign.

It's fantastically impressive, and makes me want to keep practicing my Pilates exercises. Because I can't help believing it's possible to do this sort of thing without the benefit of Henry or any other post-production machine. It's actually a little-known fact that men can move their willies in any way they want, although, obviously we keep this fact a secret, otherwise we'd never get a moment's peace: "I'm trying to watch the football." - "Oh go on, do that Sooty impression again."

I'm sure this sort of humour will appeal to schoolgirls of a certain age. Well, any age, really. Any age from LFA to 80. (LFA is based on the acronym used by alcohol clients to describe their target market, where the lowest age parameter is legal drinking age or LDA.)

Clarks tell us that life's a catwalk. I love this strategy, although the execution seems quite similar to its previous work.

DaimlerChrysler's ads have intriguing stories, but they look as if they could have come from any one of about 15 different campaigns.

And then we come across Magic. What can be said about Mother that hasn't been said already? Well, they're fucking crap. That's never been said about them before. And the reason is that actually they're so bloody good.

At a time when most so-called hotshops are producing work that is tepid at best, Mother keeps knocking out genuinely entertaining ads.

This (frankly hilarious) ad is based on the practice whereby dogs twitch in their sleep, and shows a whole family twitching involuntarily in their slumbers to a catchy tune, courtesy of Magic. I'd love to see the next one in the series where other canine behaviour is mimicked, and a man licks his own bollocks, shags his sister, drinks water from a toilet and eats his own vomit "as if by Magic".

It doesn't make me think very differently about Magic - other than to feel grateful to them for approving such a bloody funny comedy sketch.

But these days, that's not a bad start. One thing Mother's done for the industry is show us all how important it is to entertain viewers.

Because, if we don't, not to put too fine a point on it, we're fucked.

Now, I believe we can do even more than this, but that's a different article.

PlayStation ads are quite often the freshest ads on the box, and this one is no exception. Lovely and spooky.

And finally, the Electoral Commission. I used to think that getting people to vote was a very tough brief, and, after seeing these ads, I still do.

At a time when the BNP is fielding three candidates in Sunderland, getting people to vote has never been more important.

Here's a fantastic opportunity for the ad industry to do something positive, provocative and worthwhile. When millions of people vote for Stars in Their Eyes, it seems a shame that we can't get them to vote for something a little bit more important.

Sony PlayStation

Project: Launch ad for Primal Rage

Client: Katrin Owosu, product manager

Brief: Create intrigue and mainstream appeal for a fantasy game

Agency: TBWA/London

Writer: Tara Ford

Art director: David Dao

Director: Nicolai Fuglsig

Production company: Outsider

Exposure: National TV and cinema


Project: DaimlerChrysler corporate campaign

Client: Eckhard Strauss, director of corporate marketing

Brief: Demonstrate that DaimlerChrysler leads the way in developing new

automotive technology

Agency: Springer & Jacoby UK

Writers: Ben Carson, Thomas Chudulla, Wayne Guthrie

Art directors: Elliot Harris, Tony Hector, Azar Kazimir

Typographers: Tivy Davis, Louise Long

Photographer: FA Cesar

Exposure: Global publications


Project: Magic FM

Client: Paul Coleman, marketing manager

Brief: Capture the feel-good essence of Magic FM

Agency: Mother

Writer: Mother

Art director: Mother

Director: Danny Kleinman

Production company: Spectre

Exposure: London TV


Project: Clarks spring/summer 2003

Client: Ted Hart, advertising and communications manager

Brief: Demonstrate that Clarks offers a range of fashionable and

wearable shoes for everyday life

Agency: St Luke's

Writer: Alistair Campbell

Art director: Suzanne Hails

Director: Carl Erik Rinsch

Production company: RSA London

Exposure: UK and Republic of Ireland terrestrial and satellite TV


Project: Simple Sun

Clients: Tenley Soanes, marketing and communications controller;

Caroline Ashmead, brand manager; Katherine Mossop, assistant brand


Brief: Dramatise Simple Sun's ability to prevent irritations caused by

the sun

Agency: Us

Writer: Us

Art director: Us

Director: Us

Production company: Independent Films

Exposure: National TV, viral


Project: Devolved government elections

Client: Anne Hinds, director of media and public affairs

Brief: Encourage turnout at elections for the Scottish Parliament and

the National Assembly for Wales

Agency: St Luke's

Writer: Alistair Campbell

Art director: Suzanne Hails

Typographer: Robert Sparks

Silkscreen artist: Kate Gibb

Exposure: TV, posters, press