I’m sure one of my friends (who happens to be black) holds me personally responsible for the fact that he in particular, and black people generally, do not appear in ads.

I’m sure one of my friends (who happens to be black) holds me

personally responsible for the fact that he in particular, and black

people generally, do not appear in ads.

I find the position ultimately indefensible and best resolved by me

buying the next three rounds. You can see his point when all we seem to

do as an industry is try to put black people in the Army. I can see the

’Kitchener’ poster costing me a few drinks. It’s a strong enough image

even if I have seen it a thousand times before. The problem is the line

that is totally lacking any promise or reward. Said friend is likely to

remember it as ’your country needs you off the streets and I’ll have a

large Jack Daniels thank you very much’.

The ’changing of the guard’ press ad is on much safer ground, offering

the prospect of being able to get somewhere in the Army. The Queen’s

Guard at Buckingham Palace in this instance. For the Army, not the best,

but better.

So Nikita sprays her fingertips with deodorant, gets strapped into a

chair and electronically monitored to see if she’s telling porkies. Sure

enough, she gets away with it. Well, it may work on girls but a bloke

would never get away with it if he’d soaked himself in the stuff for


It’s all quite stylish and makes a welcome change from the familiar

marathon girl under a hot sun, but I can’t see the creatives on Impulse

being in need of this product when it comes to toiletries and cosmetics

in next year’s British Television Awards.

For every five pounds you spend at the Co-op you receive a voucher

enabling local schools to buy computer equipment. An offer particularly

welcome if, like the kids in this commercial, you’re trying to play

baseball with a tomato and french bread, basketball with a melon and

football with a cabbage. A nice, simple idea suitably executed a la


Having said that, the last time I played football with Dave Waters we

couldn’t have done worse with a cabbage, being the early victims in a

knockout tournament that saw only one victory against the Tape Gallery


Talking of bad hair days, in the Hewlett-Packard commercial we see a

barber accidentally trim a strip of hair from the back of a customer’s

head. As the unsuspecting customer has nodded off, he hasn’t yet

realised this. Nor will he, thanks to a young boy adept at Photoshop and

a nearby computer. You can guess the rest.

It’s an old joke, but if you like Sedelmaier you’ll probably like the

film. Personally, I can’t help feeling that somewhere in Photoshop

someone missed the chance to create a new joke.

Leaving the barber’s, what we have for the weekend is the Observer. The

last posters I noticed for a newspaper (and the first for a long while)

was the recent ’under the skin of sport’ series for the Times. The

strong visual idea helped, which is really the problem with the

Observer. You end up having to write lines like Tim Delaney and getting

a bit lost, along with everyone else who’s tried to do the same


That said, the Lynn Barber execution is a pretty good attempt and was my

favourite ad out of the lot. One last point. Does it really need ’every

Sunday’ next to the Observer logo?

Finally, we have two fairy Godmothers armed with a TV remote that zaps

splodges of paint in the shape of Mickey Mouse’s head. They zap each

other and, in one instance, Jamie Redknapp, before we see the line:

’What’s going on?’ Even knowing it’s for the Disney Channel, I haven’t

got a clue. There is, however, an accompanying phone number which I wish

I had rung before flying to New York where I’m writing this.

What I can tell is that it’s all quite good fun and they were my

girlfriend’s favourite out of this week’s crop. (No, she’s not 12.)

Daft, but noticeable. They’re typical, as opposed to vintage, HHCL.

P.S Could someone tape Gold for me? Mondays 9pm.

The Scott Trust

Project: The Observer

Client: Stephen Palmer, marketing director

Brief: Demonstrate that the Observer is sharp and modern

Agency: Ogilvy & Mather

Writer: Nicola Gill

Art director: Sally Bargman

Typographers: Michael Ong, Steve O’Leary

Exposure: Regional posters

Co-operative Retail Services

Project: Co-operative

Client: David Robey, chief executive, food

Brief: Reposition the Co-Operative as part of the modern retail scene

Agency: Duckworth Finn Grubb Waters

Writers: Tim Brown, Brendan Wilkins (price TV), Brendan Wilkins (sports


Art directors: Simon Riley, Paul Hancock (price TV), Paul Hancock

(sports equipment)

Directors: Mark Denton (price TV), Rory Rooney (sports equipment)

Production co: Godman

Exposure: National TV


Project: HP DeskJet 690C

Client: David Sharpe, macrom programme manager

Brief: Dramatise the benefits of the HP DeskJet 690C

Agency: Saatchi & Saatchi

Writer: Robin Murtough

Art director: Keith Terry

Director: Joe Sedelmaier

Production company: Sedelmaier Productions

Exposure: International TV

British Army/COI

Project: Ethnic minority recruitment campaign

Clients: Colonel Rory Clayton, Colonel Wayne Harber, Major Scottie Adam

Brief: Demonstrate the Army’s commitment to rid itself of racism and

encourage more people from ethnic minorities to consider the Army as a

viable career option

Agency: Saatchi & Saatchi

Writer: Adam Kean

Art director: Alexandra Taylor

Photographer: Alistair Thain Typographer: Tim Quest

Exposure: National press

Elida Faberge

Project: Sure

Client: Andi Schmidlechner, brand manager

Brief: Bring the product closer to the consumer

Agency: Ammirati Puris Lintas

Writer: Laurence Blume

Art director: Fraser Adamson

Director: Fabrice Carazo

Production co: Pink Films

Exposure: National TV

The Walt Disney Corporation

Project: Disney Channel

Client: Mike Spencer, marketing director

Brief: Support the launch of Disney Channel’s new studio and outside

broadcast team

Agency: The HHCL Brasserie

Creative team: Elizabeth Whiston and David Shelton

Directors: Elizabeth Whiston and David Shelton

Production company: The HHCL Brasserie

Exposure: National TV


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