A little later in this column we'll get to the meaning of life, but

in the meantime here's a story about a car and a peacock. They co-star

in the new Peugeot 206 commercial. On seeing the slightly sexy Peugeot

convertible, the peacock gets the horn, and sports its glorious


In response, the car's automatic roof rises to an enormous height,

causing the peacock, plumage between legs, to beat an emasculated

retreat. I'm all for a spot of artistic licence, but a peacock getting

turned on by a Peugeot smacks of contrivance, which is quite a different


Peacocks should concentrate on peacocks, and cars on strong ideas. That

way everyone will have more fun. The Al Green track on the commercial

is, needless to say, wonderful.

The new commercial for Guardian Unlimited features the best display of

choreographed origami you're ever likely to see. To a reggae track we

see loads of Guardians folding into building upon building, then city

upon city, until a whole world made of Guardians lies before us. The

line goes: 'More breadth, more depth.' Showing Guardians constructing

the facade of things is a curious way to dramatise 'depth', and, more

importantly, whatever else you think of The Guardian, it has always been

provocative. This advertising is bland, more about scale than


There are times in the new Guinness commercial where narcotics threaten

to triumph over narrative, but after a while all becomes clear. The wait

this time is for the champion of the dream club to awaken from his sleep

and reveal nothing less than the meaning of life. The film looks

absolutely stunning, and I for one would rather watch this beautiful

nonsense than anything else on commercial television. Still, let's get

tedious: by dint of its artiness the commercial will flatter the

committed Guinness drinker, but will it draw in your lager boy intent on

more immediate and accessible pleasure? Probably not.

The new Holsten Pils campaign proclaims: 'It's the Daddy.' Why it's 'the

Daddy' I have no idea. Perhaps it doesn't get out as much as it used


No matter, in one commercial the central character debates what kind of

film deserves to be called 'the Daddy', and in another, what flavour of

crisp. Riveting subjects both (no, really) but the dialogue is as sharp

as you might find in your average Arnie blockbuster. At the end of both

commercials an indistinct figure ambles across screen and our main guy

says: 'Hello George.' That would be George the Bear, and George feels

like a last-minute grope for credibility.

Time to get serious, because the next commercial is about the

immeasurably important subject of children, and their future. It's paid

for by Unicef, announces the Global Movement for Children, and I wish to

God it was brilliant.

A young boy from Mozambique implores us: 'We are children ... do not

treat us like kids.' Kids? Children? The two words mean exactly the same

thing, and carry the same feelings. The boy then walks into the arms of

Nelson Mandela, who hugs him. To reduce the most respected man on the

planet to the role of geezer in flowery shirt hugging kid (sorry, child)

seems profligate.

The print campaign for Trigger Happy TV is extraordinary, if only

because it reveals no clue as to what it's advertising.

It'll be lapped up by people who would watch the programme anyway, and

leave the uninitiated bemused.


Project: Guinness masterbrand dream club

Clients: Syl Saller, marketing director; David Smith, marketing


Brief: Drive affinity with core target audience

Agency: Abbott Mead Vickers BBDO

Writer: Walter Campbell

Art director: Walter Campbell

Director: Jonathan Glazer

Production company: Academy

Exposure: National TV


Project: Trigger Happy TV

Client: Katie Hayes, marketing manager entertainment

Brief: Use marketing to give people a Trigger Happy TV experience


Agencies: Michaelides & Bednash and Creative Partnership in

collaboration with Dom Jolly

Writer: Dom Jolly

Art director: Dom Jolly

Typographer: Creative Partnership

Photographer: Creative Partnership

Exposure: Flyposters, posters and national press


Project: Peugeot 206 Coupe Cabriolet

Client: Andre Cherid, marketing director

Brief: Launch the new Peugeot 206 Coupe Cabriolet

Agency: Euro RSCG Spain

Writer: Eva Cobo

Art director: Rafael Garcia

Director: Chris Hartwill

Production company: RSA/Psycho

Exposure: Cinema


Project: Guardian Unlimited

Client: Marc Sands, marketing director

Brief: Raise awareness and drive traffic to

Agency: BMP DDB

Writer: Simon Veksner

Art director: Nick Allsop

Directors (animators): Ben Murray and Dan Seddon

Production company: Clear

Exposure: National TV


Project: Holsten Pils

Client: Andy Edge, marketing director

Brief: Re-establish Holsten Pils as the epitome of real lager

Agency: TBWA/London

Writer: Ben Priest

Art director: Brian Campbell

Director: Kevin Thomas

Production company: Thomas Thomas

Exposure: National TV


Project: Global Movement for Children

Client: Corinne Woods, senior communications officer

Brief: Change awareness of the way people think about children and their

rights and create awareness of the Global Movement for Children

Agency: TBWA/London

Writer: Trevor Beattie

Art director: Bill Bungay

Director: Hugh Hudson

Production company: RSA

Exposure: Global TV

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