A view from Dave Trott: If the Greeks had social media
A view from Dave Trott

A view from Dave Trott: If the Greeks had social media

About 3,000 years ago the Greeks were outside Troy trying to get in.

All they had to rely on was Agamemnon’s old-fashioned thinking.
But imagine if Odysseus had been the 'Social Media Guru' of the age.

Agamemnon: (gets up and stretches) "This siege has been dragging on for 9 years. Sod it, I’ve had enough. Let’s go home."
Odysseus: (excited) "Not now, we’ve just developed The Killer App."
Agamemnon: (sits down, interested) "The Killer App?"
Odysseus: "Yes, the thing that’s going to change everything."
Agamemnon: "Okay, you’ve got my attention."
Odysseus: (stands up, spreads arms) "The..…Wooden..…Horse."
Agamemnon: "That’s it: a wooden horse?"
Odysseus: "Not just any wooden horse, man. It’s a humongous, ginormous wooden uber-horse. It’ll be awesome."
Agamemnon: (frowns) "So?"
Odysseus: "So we leave it outside the walls of Troy and pretend to sail away. And the Trojans, get this, the Trojans drag it inside."
Agamemnon: "Why would they do that?"
Odysseus: "Because they think it’s a gift from the gods."
Agamemnon: (stands up, excited) "Ah, I get where you're coming from! We’ve actually filled it up with soldiers, and when the Trojans are asleep, they’ll jump out, open the gates for us, and we run in and slaughter everyone! Brilliant Odysseus, I love it."
Odysseus: "Uh, actually dude we don’t do that….just beating the enemy is dinosaur thinking.
Agamemnon: "… why, what’s wrong with that?"
Odysseus: "It’s just old-fashioned interruptive media. Once the job’s done, it's over. It'll be short lived, no one will remember it!"
Agamemnon: "But we'll have accomplished our mission…"
Odysseus: "You’re thinking too small."
Agamemnon: (pinches the top of his nose and sighs loudly) "Sorry, but I just don’t get it."
Odysseus: "That’s because you’re stuck in the past, bro."
Agamemnon: (Closes eyes and holds hand up) ""Okay, okay. Just tell me what happens after they drag the horse inside."
Odysseus: "Well, then we start the ‘conversation’."
Agamemnon: (wearily) "The ‘conversation’?"
Odysseus: "Yes, first off we get loads of ‘hits’."
Agamemnon: (opens one eye) "Now you’re talking: ‘hits’?"
Odysseus: "Yes, people are so intrigued they come up and look at it. We call each look a ‘hit’."
Agamemnon: (slumps back) "Oh, then what?"
Odysseus: "Then it gets lots of ‘likes’."
Agamemnon: (raises eyebrows) "Lots of ‘likes’?"
Odysseus: "Yes, lots of people like it."
Agamemnon: (shakes head) "Then what?"
Odysseus: "Then we get lots and lots of ‘coverage’."
Agamemnon: "They throw covers over it?"
Odysseus: (rolls eyes upward) "No dude, everyone writes about it."
Agamemnon: "And that helps us, how?"
Odysseus: "Well, by that time it’s gone ‘viral’."
Agamemnon: "Viral?"
Odysseus: "Yes, the horse achieves a fame of its own."
Agamemnon: "O-kay... and how does that help us get into Troy?"
Odysseus: "Well, now it’s a media phenomenon."
Agamemnon: "… Uh huh."
Odysseus: "Don’t you see? It’ll be awesome!"
Agamemnon: "I get all that Odysseus, I really do… But how is it going to help us get into Troy?"
Odysseus: "Well…….everyone will be talking about it."
Agamemnon: "But they’ll be talking about the horse, right? They won’t be talking about letting us into Troy."
Odysseus: "You’re missing the point, it’s OUR horse they’re talking about."
Agamemnon: "O - kay, so let me just check I’ve got this right. We give them a huge wooden horse with no soldiers inside. They drag it inside and everyone talks about it while we hang around outside and don’t do anything. That’s your plan?"
Odysseus: "Yes! It’s totally beta, no one’s tried anything like it before."
Agamemnon: (stands up and starts to strap on armour) "Tell you what, I think I’m going to go with the original plan. Give them a horse full of soldiers. They take the horse inside. When they’re asleep, the soldiers jump out, let us in and we kill everyone. It’s simple, it’s functional, call me old fashioned but I like it."

Odysseus: "Dude, you just don’t get new media.  People could have been talking about ‘The Wooden Horse’ for ages."